Not so hot Grammy

It's good to wake up in the morning and hear the media agreeing with you. I'm not just a guitarist nearing 40 that has to take Rogaine and has never put out a band CD. No big deal, because by the looks of it, the Music Industrial Complex is going to have to start all over again. Product lines, endorsements and Disney Deals are not going to save the biz from lack of unit sales. Thanks Courtney Hazlett of MSNBC's excellent Morning Joe, and J. Freedom DuLac of Washington Post for highlighting the desperate spinnings and bizarre combinations of acts devised to bridge the Gap to nowhere, nobody's listening. My personal media darling would have had even less tolerance, had she been watching with me, alas she was out viewing the vomitous stereotype-laden box office mess He's just not that into you.

My proposal is, support local venues, local acts, local radio.

But back to the broadcast that got in the way of more worthy, compelling programming. Fucking Coldplay. Stop Stop Stop Stop, Fucking die already. Couldn't even wait for the actual Grammy broadcast, CBS gives you a double dose of douchebag by profiling them on 60 Fucking Minutes. Ruined any good will gained by their long exclusive interview with Chelsey Sullenberger. I hate their fake fucking energy, their Scientology-like aura, their stupid fucking outfits, and their obivious U2 Ripoff sound.

At the risk of sounding completely heartless, I 'm merely being cynical when I say whoever wrote Jennifer Hudson's song was cashing in on an incidence of great tragedy. A massive publicity tour was in place for Hudson's new album before the murders, and the time has come to resume said tour. The spotlight and the drama will be prolific, so a song reflecting the suggested "love of the fans" is the perfect sheild. Still, a decent songwriter should be able to come up with a more profound couplet for such a situation than "I was so confused, you pulled me through". Why confused anyway? The question is simply "Why". This must be an area where euphemisms for violence are intensely muted while euphemisms for sex songs are amplified.

Speaking of couplets, Kanye West can't write for shit. His rhymes suck, or simply don't rhyme, there are repeats, his pathos is bourgeois bullshit. Lil' Wayne is an atrocious no-talent diva, TI and Jay-Z are overrated. Hip hop in general is completely out of dope, meaning it is fucking wack. Whatever happened to 2 turntables and a microphone, maybe a sampled instrument or two? These guys egos are so big, they all have to have a big band with strings, horns, multiple keyboards and backup singers. It's too fucking loud, you don't get a moment's pause. It's like being in an exclusive club where everyone is at a private table, screaming over the house system about their respective bling.
Now I get it. But it still sucks. Where's the urban consciousness?

Robert Plant & Allison Krauss winning album of the year, for consecutive years adult contemporary wins over more sellable rock products. OK fine, but this one just feels like a concellation prize for devoted Zeppelin fans, mad at Plant for not getting on the plane. God, I'd love to see Air Zeppelin take flight again. One listen to Chasing Sand and you can tell how much Boo, Boo, Boogie, Rob's got left in the tank. Sad getting old, but I plan on rocking out like Jimmy Page when I reach his age and have hundreds of guitars in a room waiting to be played.

Taylor Swift, guitar hero? It's one thing to strum a few chords of self-accompaniment, but now she's ripping leads behind Carrie Underwood. She's what, 18 years old? A marvel of biological engineering or merely miming an overdub?

Regarding the Chris Brown/Rihanna situation, these people are human beings with a history and a past. A history of abuse cannot stayed bottled up within the papparazzi glare, which is probably the reason they were trying to keep their relationship out of the public eye. It's a shame, Chris Brown is actually very talented, I liked his radio hit with Bow Wow "Shortie Like Mine". There is a curious divide with Rihanna's public and private lives, her father is apparently still living in poverty. And hello, apparently this morning the LA Times reports Rihanna is claiming the typical euphemism of the abused, claiming she was in a traffic incident.

The stress of being under contract, even working for Lifetime Achievement Award winner Clive Davis must be weighty despite him being "such a wonderful man, thanks for giving me the opportunity". Perhaps it's not worth it. I play music for the fun of creating original spontaneous ideas, not because I want to back up McCartney and wear a rented suit for the occasion and have my hair gelled up to here. Download my music all you want people, it's public domain. My music investment goes towards improving my environment and my self esteem.
Lawsuits won't help us get through this recession so why not let the music return to it's organic form and stop trying so hard to squeeze more money out of it.


What's the big deal? MIA has been performing preggers for months!